Posts Tagged ‘Patrice Cormier’

A few things you don’t know about Lou Lamoriello

February 9th, 2010

The hockey world is still buzzing after last Thursday’s trade that saw Ilya Kovalchuk moved to the New Jersey Devils. Many experts, pundits and creepy classy basement bloggers were blown away by Devils GM Lou Lamoriello picking up a world class superstar for “nothing“. Virtually no one saw Kovalchuk going to the Devils. Everyone predicted the Kings or Bruins to land the Russian star. And since trading for a star rental player isn’t Lamoriello’s style,  it begs the question, what else don’t I know about Lou? To help, I’ve compiled a brief list for you.

  • Lamoriello refers to the Eastern Conference playoff race as “the Eastern Conference trap”.
  • The main reason Lamoriello re-hired Jacques Lemaire is beacuse he likes Jacques hair cut.
  • Lamoriello actually informs Eklund about Devils trades months before they occur. He knows no one believes Eklund anyways.
  • Despite popular belief, Lamoriello does not watch Jersey Shore. Although, he’s had the nickname “The Situation” for years.
  • Contrary to denying reports that he “dumped” Patrice Cormier in the Kovalchuk trade… he did. And he’s pretty happy about it too.
  • Despite the Devils record being 6th best in the NHL, there’s a relatively good chance Lemaire will be fired with approximately 2-3 games remaining in the regular season. Just sayin’.
  • Lamoriello made Bob Gainey step down as the Montreal Canadiens GM.
  • Lamoriello knows you are reading this article and potentially laughing at him.

Stay classy, Lou Lamoriello.

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Fantana gets it wrong… Again! Kovalchuk is traded to New Jersey!

February 5th, 2010

Okay okay… so I blew another trade rumour. Big deal. It’s not like anyone not named Burgundy is counting, right? The only thing I’m trying to figure out now is if I was dumb enough to actually put money on this or not… oh God… what are the odds Burgundy doesn’t read this blog?

Anyway, for the entire season, I’ve been singing the praises of Ilya Kovalchuk and the Atlanta Thrashers. All along, I’ve been talking about how they would eventually get a deal done and keep Kovy in Hot-lanta. Well, I was wrong.

In case you missed it, here’s the deal:

To Atlanta: Johnny Oduya, Niclas Bergfors, Patrice Cormier, NJ’s 1st and 2nd round picks in 2010

To New Jersey: Ilya Kovalchuk and Anssi Salmela, ATL’s 2nd round pick in 2010

This is a strange deal for both teams. My first thought I saw this trade was “ew”.

To start with, I’m blown away by Ilya Kovalchuk. Just when you think he’s grown up and gained some maturity, he does his best Denace the Menace impression. All season, he acted like he wanted to remain a Thrasher by saying and doing all the right things. Maybe he never explicitly said he wanted to stay in Atlanta, but he never declared that he had no intention of resigning either. He acted like he was all about ‘the team’ and that he wanted to play for a contender. Didn’t he pressure Atlanta GM Don Waddell to bring in a better supporting cast for him to play with? I understand he’s Atlanta’s captain and leader, but does it not seem a little under-handed to make those kind of demands, essentially get them, and not re-sign? Atlanta are a good team this year and I believe they will still make the playoffs. To make matters worse, Kovalchuk’s apparently demanding to become the league’s highest paid player. One question Ilya: Why?

Remember when Paul Kariya was in the prime of his career and became a UFA in Anaheim? The Ducks offered him a few different deals worth $10 Million a season and Kariya rejected them, instead, opting for a 1 year contract for $1.2 Million with Colorado so he could have a chance to win the Stanley Cup. At least you can say Kariya’s decision wasn’t about the money. He truly wanted to play on legitimate Cup contender, and he believed Colorado was his best bet. Fair enough. That sucks if you were a Ducks fan, but fair enough.

Back to Kovalchuk. He rejected two offers from Atlanta this season. The first was a 12 year deal reportedly worth $101 Million. When Ilya voiced his desire to become the league’s highest paid player, Atlanta acquiesced, offering him a $70 Million contract over 7 years because the $101 Million deal only averaged $8.4 Million per season. Somehow, both offers were flatly rejected. I’m guessing Kovalchuk doesn’t follow the stock markets and I’m betting when he reads the daily paper, he skips the business section and goes straight to the cartoons. Is he not aware of the massive global recession? Obama’s Trillion dollar budget deficit? America’s overwhelming unemployment figures? A $70 or $101 Million contract is way more than anyone needs! The Cherry on the top is that from the way Waddell has described the trade talks, apparently neither of those figures were high enough for Kovalchuk.

When I look at Atlanta’s return, it doesn’t seem high enough. I feel like the return they got for Marian Hossa a couple years ago was roughly the same, maybe even a little better. It’s hard to say, but I suppose like all big trades, this one will come down to how the prospects develop, namely Patrice Cormier and that 1st round draft pick, whoever that may be.

However, when you approach the trade from a ‘rental player’ perspective, which Kovalchuk absolutely will be for the Devils, the return doesn’t seem so bad. Bergfors is an emerging young player who will likely become a top 6 forward and have a good NHL career. Oduya is an affordable, defensive blueliner who plays a lot of big minutes for the Devils and their no-name defense. Cormier, for all the bad plays he’s made in 2010, and there are several, will probably play in the NHL next year. So overall, it’s not a terrible return for Kovalchuk. I think those three players will probably offset most of Kovalchuk’s production over the course of a full season, while adding some depth to the Thrasher lineup. There’s no ‘name’ player coming back in return, but there never usually is with this type of trade. Go ask Sens fans if you don’t believe me.

I also wonder about New Jersey in all this. Adding Kovalchuk up front looks good on paper, but giving up Bergfors and Oduya makes me believe they’ve actually lost ground with this deal. Having said that, a Parise-Zajac-Kovalchuk line is a pretty scary thought. This line will need to be really, really good to offset the loss of depth.

I’m also surprised that this was apparently the best offer out there. For all the rumours involving the Los Angeles Kings and the Chicago Blackhawks, I’m surprised nobody could beat New Jersey’s package. It could just be that Atlanta were aiming too high and all the other teams in the mix didn’t want to overpay for a rental player. In that case, I say good call.

Finally, I wonder how Kovalchuk will do in New Jersey’s defense-first system. It should be interesting. My best guess is that he’ll look just like Gaborik did in Minnesota – constantly stymied.

I used to really like Ilya Kovalchuk but this whole ordeal has left me a little sour on him. Here’s to Atlanta having a great finish to their season and to making the playoffs. It would truly be awesome if the Thrashers met the Devils in the playoffs and Atlanta came out on top. That would be some major divine retribution! Let’s hope that happens.

Your Reporter in the Field,

Fantana

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Headshots, and how to deal with them

February 3rd, 2010

If there is one term in hockey right now that is beaten to death, it’s “headshots.”

Even yesterday, without any recent provocation (Patrice Cormier notwithstanding), Sun Media printed an article on the topic, declaring that Canadians want to see headshots eliminated from the game of hockey. The only anomaly that they didn’t mention is that both metropolises of Ottawa and Edmonton voted overwhelmingly in favour of headshots being exclusively dealt to Dany Heatley.

With no solution in sight, I thought it might be prudent to make a few suggestions on what the NHL can do to eliminate headshots from the game.

  • Have Marty McSorley negotiate all future contracts for the NHLPA. The direct economic impact of his negotiating skills would create fear about potential brain damage.
  • At all NHL training camps, incorporate the new Chris Pronger Obstacle course. At the end of the course, have Chris Pronger get sacked by successful players. He may never elbow again. Or never ask to be traded for undisclosed reasons.
  • Have all helmets fitted with chaff release based on a proximity sensor located in players’ pads. When an approaching elbow or shoulder gets too close to the helmet, chaff is released, blinding the opposing player.
  • Offending players will be forced to gently stroke Alex Ovechkin’s sticks all day until they are warm, but not too hot to handle. While this may reduce scoring, the YouTube videos will be punishment enough.
  • Initiate simple retrofits to hockey helmets, featuring Viking thorns and German WWI spikes.
  • A player caught in the act of a headshot shall change his name to ‘Downie’, wear the number ‘9′, and play every game against Matt Carkner, where he will be Carkner-fied.
  • Have the offending player traded to the Toronto Maple Leafs, where their truculence will be initially welcomed until they realize they’re playing for Toronto.
  • Un-retire Bobby Clarke, and have him break ankles after each headshot.

Stay classy, unsolved NHL headshots.

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8 alternative punishments for Patrice Cormier

January 21st, 2010

On Wednesday, the Quebec Major Junior Hockey League revealed while they don’t yet have a punishment for Patrice Cormier, they expect to have one at some point next week.

While it seems odd the QMJHL would make an announcement to announce another announcement on Cormier’s punishment is forthcoming, it’s probably something they should take their time with to ensure the right form of discipline is handed out. Cormier’s punishment presents an interesting dilemma for Commissioner Gilles Courteau and the QMJHL. Courteau needs to send a strong message to Cormier, the league, and the hockey world that this type of play cannot and will not be tolerated. However, this needs to be done in a way that doesn’t make OHL Commissioner David Branch and his previous punishments look insignificant or over the top.

Since decisions like these can be tough, I’d like to offer some suggestions to Courteau and the QMJHL, should they require additional help or advice. Below are the top 8 alternative punishments for Patrice Cormier, courtesy of Stayclassy.net:

  • Have Cormier use his elbow to iron and flatten all of Sean Avery’s clothes. Even the sloppy seconds clothes.
  • Send Cormier back to the World Junior Championships next year to learn how to properly captain a Canadian hockey team. While he’s there, maybe he can keep Pierre McGuire from ‘unleashing’ any more Taylor Hall-ice cream quotes.
  • Have Cormier deliver a similar elbow-shot to the President of NBC for extending Jay Leno’s career after we thought he might finally retire.
  • Have Cormier play for the Toronto Maple Leafs so he can learn how true pugnacity is played. Fact: I had as much trouble typing that as you did reading it…
  • In a cross-promotional effort, have Cormier deliver another similar elbow-shot in a WWE fight to help promote Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson’s new hockey movie, “The Toothfairy”.
  • Have Cormier watch the world’s worst movie once a day, every day for as many days as Mikael Tam takes to fully recover. Of course, the movie I’m referring to is Garden State.
  • Have Cormier deliver two more elbow-shots to Alex Burrows and Stephane Auger for making hockey fans hear more crying and moaning from sports “professionals” than found in an episode of Jersey Shore.
  • Immediately promote Cormier to the NHL to play for Pat Quinn and the Edmonton Oilers. That in itself should be punishment enough.

Stay classy, Gilles Courteau and the QMJHL.

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Patrice Cormier’s “Killshot”

January 18th, 2010

In case you haven’t seen this horrific headshot (or killshot as Kyle Roussel put it on twitter), check out the clip below. The most recent captain of the Canadian World Junior team, Patrice Cormier, delivers an elbow to Mikael Tam in a QMJHL game this weekend.

This was Cormier’s third game with the Rouyn-Noranda Huskies. He was recently traded from the Rimouski Oceanic to the Huskies earlier this month to help with their playoff drive and Memorial Cup chances. It’s probably a safe assumption Comier’s season is over as a result of this hit, however, no punishment has been announced yet.

According to KuklasKorner and other various reports, Tam is in stable condition with no brain damage and a few missing teeth. Patrick Roy, the owner and coach of the Quebec Remparts (Tam’s team), has reportedly filed a complaint with the local police.

** A quick update- 4:30pm
There are some unconfirmed reports that suggest Tam might have suffered serious brain trauma after all. At this point, I personally have no additional knowledge of the  situation. I’m only reporting what I’ve heard/read. I hope Tam recovers soon and quickly.

** Suspension update- Jan 25, 2010
Cormier was suspended for the balance of the season and playoffs (including the Memorial Cup) – a maximum of 48 possible games.  This is the longest suspension in QMJHL history.

Suggestions

When we see headshots and nasty hits like this in Junior hockey leagues, more often than not, it’s from players who are in their final Junior years (generally speaking – not always the case). Punishments usually ends up as suspensions for the remainder of the year and that’s it. How about having a punishment that affects these players future? In Cormier’s case, he’s a New Jersey Devils draft pick. How about delaying his pro career by a number of games or months, etc…? Perhaps this isn’t realistic, but something else needs to be done – the punishment can’t end once the Huskies season concludes. Cormier’s actions affect the Huskies (who traded talent/prospects to acquire his services), the Remparts, the life of Tam, and possibly the New Jersey Devils.

I believe Junior hockey needs to deliver punishments that follow these players around for longer than a year ending suspension plus a bad reputation. This would serve as a good opportunity for the NHL and Canadian Junior leagues to ensure a strong message about player safety is sent. Another suggestion would be for Cormier to spend time with minor hockey programs to ensure they understand safety and the do’s and don’t of the game. Consider it community service or something. Let’s make Cormier the poster boy for everything the game doesn’t need. This hit was anything but classy and it should be Cormier’s job to make as much of a positive contribution to hockey as he’s made negative contributions from this hit.

Stay classy, Mikael Tam. Hopefully you have a speedy recovery.

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