Tambland and Burgundy here. Watching the skills competition, and putting down our own skills to offer our thoughts on tonight’s action.

6:50- Apparently you can get a Alex Ovechkin haircut in Washington for $14….the picture they showed wasn’t too flattering….
6:59- Just heard Sheldon Souray say he could beat Zdeno Chara in the hardest shot competition. His bionic wrist must be making a superb comeback.
7:01- The new Hockey Night in Canada theme just played. It’s growing on us. We were just talking about adopting it as our new news theme.
7:02- Mike Milbury did not hit Kelly Hrudey with a shoe….or hit Pierre McGuire for disagreeing with him…I guess the spirit of the All-Star Game reached all the way to the broadcast booth. Note: Al Strachan is nowhere to be seen.
7:04- An Ottawa Senators fan just made it on the Jumbotron at the Bell Centre….The boos were noticeably absent….I guess they’re still not aware of the fact that we’ll be beating them in the first round this year.
7:05- Ummmm, who is this band……and why is the organ spinning…..if they put the Stanley Cup upside down after this, Ron might have to kick Baxter off a bridge….and nobody wants that.
7:06- Marc Savard just looked at Marty St. Louis and told him he was going to be to crushed….I guess they forgot they were on the same team.
7:07- Isn’t it “Olay Olay Olay Olay…” not “Oway Oway Oway Oway.” Again, a massive fail.
7:08- We’ve discussed it and decided we won’t criticize the entire competition. After all, Mantooth hasn’t had anything to do with this disaster so far. Although we wouldn’t be surprised if he was somewhere behind the scenes.
7:11- Sheldon Souray just skated out and wasn’t booed. I guess they forgot about that Jason Spezza goal a few years ago…..we haven’t!
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hy0pXTnx85Q&hl=en&fs=1]

I wondered if Marc Streit will get booed……
7:12- Marc Streit not booed. Weird….
7:14- Vincent Lecavalier just got a standing ovation…..Ecklund just posted a ‘Rumour Update’ claiming Vincent talks have stalled…..Montreal fans don’t seem to care…..Actually, nobody does. He should be captain of the Eastern Conference team. Vincent, not Ecklund.
7:22- Why aren’t Martin St. Louis and Patrick Marleau in the fastest skater????? Burgundy is calling Mason Raymond, but Tambland is calling Andrew Cogliano….we’ll see…..
7:23- Two things….the clock isn’t working…..Second thing: the reporting on this is brutal….Jim Hughson just said, and we quote, “He’s making a right turn.” Don’t improvise Jim; only read off the teleprompter.
7:24- We just heard again that the digital clock isn’t working….thanks CBC….You’re no Channel 4 News Team.
7:26- Mason Raymond just stumbled…..Cogliano should have it all wrapped up…..For the first time ever, Burgundy looks stupid. For the second time ever, Tambland was right.
7:32- Is it just us, or is the reporting pretty bad on these things. (The following is not verbatim).
Scott Oake- “You really skated fast out there. What’s your secret?”
Cogliano- “Um, just keeping your head down and going.” Worst. Interview. Ever.

7:34- Patrick Kane just scored with the butt end of his stick…..CBC almost said “He just scored with his knob…”
7:37- St. Louis had the best moves so far, but the camera angle has to change. If they really want this to be like the slam dunk contest, have a camera man at the net….it’s no more dangerous than being in a pen with Grizzly Bears….
7:38- Getzlaf is losing hair….but he shouldn’t be in this anymore.
7:39- Best part of the competition so far: when they played Foo Fighters.
7:41- This goalie is too good…
7:42- CBC just reminded us that its up to us to pick a winner. I pick the music guy
7:43- Ovie’s hat, flag, two sticks and glasses just stole the show.
Ovie- “I did lots of good things….so it was kind of not good move but I try….” Second. Best. Interview. Ever.

7:44- The 21-year-old, Junior Double-A Viper goalie seems remarkably comfortable on screen. Ahem, Ottawa Senators….

COMMERCIAL BREAK

7:52- Rookie vs. Sophmore game
7:53- First goals go to the rookies….
Luc Robitaille- “If we could take a lead, we’ll go down and play the trap….” Here’s hoping he’s not serious.
7:55- Coaches should be mic’d more often. Does anybody else wish we could hear what they’re saying all the time.
7:56- CBC- “There’s so much open ice, so there’s no great defence.” Yep. Think that’s the point.
7:58- Taking a break right now. Not much to say. Don’t want to offend these guys. They are the future after all.
8:03- One of the players just asked Luc if he liked the backcheck. It’s 3 on 3. How much backchecking can you really do???
8:04- There’s was actually a bodycheck, and then Staal scored. Time to step it up Luc says. How hilarious would a huge hip check be right now?
8:12- Mark Messier says he needs to learn how to text message. Bet he can’t text just once.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x5xC9E7sIck&hl=en&fs=1]

8:30- That interview with Crosby taught nothing…..Apparently Dany Heatley is dangerous in the slot.
8:34- Ovie and Evgeni Malkin were just caught smiling on the same screen. What do you suppose they were saying? I remember once Veronica and Ron were smiling on the same screen, but Ron definitely threatened to punch her in the baby maker.
Ovie- “I’m gonna punch you in the baby maker…”
Gino- “Like you allegedly punched my agent?” Too soon?

8:40- Scott Oake and Tim Thomas just had an awkward moment.
Tim- “That’s not going to do it…”
Scott- “Um, 4 for 4. That’s going to be hard to beat there Tim.”
Tim’s thought- “Thanks for the math Scott.”
Tim’s words- “Oh. I didn’t see the fourth shot.”
Jim Hughson- “You guys are awful at play by play.”

8:44- Time for a shoot off: Malkin vs. Heatley. It’s like the playoffs all over again. Both Burgundy and Tambland pick Heater.
8:45- Damn….it really is like the playoffs all over again.
8:50- Um, don’t know what to say about this quote.
Jim Hughson- “He’s raising money for Chara….Charity…..Chara’s Charity.”
8:51- Chara scares us. He’s like a cross between a bear, a mountain lion, and the Green Giant.
8:52- We’re done blogging. New quote of the night, courtesy of Sheldon Souray, all within 30 seconds of each other:

“Keeping it low is not easy for me to do….”- Pretty good. Has some innuendo to it.
“I like a really sticky shaft….”- Alright, better.
“I’ll rub the sticky again….”- And there’s the winner!

9:01- That child must have been freaking out next to Chara. Does nobody remember that interview with Raj Binder a few years ago? Go to 2:20 of the video below….
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UL_8LPHyRcA&hl=en&fs=1]

9:28- Marc Savard misses … Shane Doan wins the shootout.
9:29- Tim Thomas- “He earned [the blocker side].” Psssssh. Good thing Doan won, or there would have been suspensions.

That’s it for Stay Classy’s coverage of the Allstar game’s skills competition.

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