Some people are more into robbery and gay bashing. Chance of Getting Laid: It's also possible that this is one of the cruelest pranks ever perpetrated using the Internet.
That whatever educational institutions this man has attended have failed him. Any attempt to read this listing will confound even the most skilled codebreaker. However, we can glean from the photos that the author has studied a martial art, wears a referee jersey while tending to small children and competes in bicycle races. It doesn't seem like much of a stretch to speculate that his dad is just barely out of the frame of the bicycle race, having just let go of the seat of his bicycle.
Where do you start? First off, any "clein" woman looking for a hook up needs to understand this strange secret language to communicate her interest. For regular human females, the logistics of using email to set up a place to rendezvous with a guy who has no grasp of the written word or any understanding of basic syntax will seem daunting.
And, if that's not enough to scare them off, he mentions tonight, "tomarow" and the weekend as times he's available. Sounds like our little buddy here isn't the most popular mental defective in Houston. I am a well built and drug free gentleman with a strong sexual drive. I have a desire to be with an expecting mother Pregnant and want to make this fantasy come true. There is something so beautiful about pregnant women and I would love nothing more than to please one.
I play no games and ask that you do the same. Right away, we know Damion is a polite guy. He opens by offering thanks for reading his listing and signs off with "sincerely" just to let you know that he's not kidding about wanting some pregger's poontang.
He does mention that he plays no games, which probably means breast-pump bingo is out of the question. From the photos, we can also note that while not chasing women with child, Damion hangs out in abandoned train yards and old water-damaged barns. Clearly, the photos are pretty damning. Had Damion went with a single photo, one might think, "Weird, he looks kinda gay. They've got enough problems without introducing a sexually-confused lover into the mix.
Also, "I am also a massage therapist" is doing Damion no favors. Roughly three out of five guys who post attest to being massage therapists.
Basically, it's code for, "I promise to provide half-assed foreplay before wanting to bang. She probably doesn't need the heaping second helping of mommy issues this guy's clearly bringing to the table.
Age and body type have intriguingly not been specified. By leading with all physical attributes including age, hair and eye color, height, weight and the description "attractive athletic," we know this guy is proud of what he looks like. The fact that he wants to meet up for a drink and exchange oral sex in a car, well, that leads one to believe that he probably lives with someone.
If it's a girlfriend or wife, that's one thing. If it's his parents, that's kind of sad, plus it might mean the car he's proposing to make out in is owned by his folks.
If any bodily fluids are spilled, be prepared to be handed a Wet- Nap. Meanwhile, he completely forgets to give any sort of indication about what type of woman he's looking for, which gives off the impression that he'll pretty much let anybody gargle his goods.
The fact that he spells maybe, "mabey" not once, but twice is also somewhat troubling. Women who like their sexual organs to be treated like the African monkey trap. If you've been there and done it, you already know and understand what's written below What follows that quote is about words describing "fisting" in extreme detail You can click on the pic for the full ad, if you must.
The verve he uses when rolling out the numbered steps of the process makes it evident that this guy will approach a possible encounter like some sort of demented camp counselor demonstrating macrame.
The header reads "Getting to be popular fun! More than likely, it's not the type of experience she wants to have just so she can share the story at the watercooler with her fisting-enthusiast co-workers.
Also, he might want to edit the tidbit about it taking " days for vagina to return to original state.
Don't be a chicken. I have rented a residence in North Vegas, off Craig street. If interested please email me for a appointment.
I am very willing to please you. Additionally, it's been indicated that our cross-dresser lives in North Vegas. And while everyone knows what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, few are familiar with the North Vegas slogan, which is: What happens in North Vegas will haunt your dreams forever. For someone who's not into female impersonators, there is so much wrong here. But even if that is your cup of tea, you've got to be taken aback by the doll photo.
That's some crazy serial-killer stuff right there. Combine that with the freaky flowers-and-curls wig and any sensible person answering this listing would have to be at least a little worried about ending up in a freezer. You provide the cute and cuddly. Not looking for a one-night thing.
I want all of the winter or when one of us finds someone better, whichever comes first. I won't have sex with you. Cuddles is probably in the wrong section, because he's looking for more than a one-time thing and he's ardent in his declaration that there will be no sex.
We can also assume that he doesn't have adequate heat in his home, as his winter-term relationship seems to involve you becoming his human space heater. You've got a picture of kittens, you've asserted that you're a year-old virgin and the best descriptions you can come up with for yourself is that you have a "high metabolism?
Cuddles, but you should consider eHarmony. If there's no ass play or misguided fantasy involved, Craigslist Casual Encounters has no use for you. Women who want to be manhandled by a lover with a questionable sense of style.
Vanilla women is out of the question and I only do KINK women that have a drive and a need to be controlled and in a submissive relationship. Although the Internet is teeming with porn, porn is about watching. Personals are about doing. Casual Encounters gives form and encouragement to your basest desires — the ones in which you hit it and quit, in which you put in your junk but not your time — leaving you free immediately afterward to get back to Farmville or eBaum's World or whatever more important thing you were doing when you got distracted by the urge and clicked on m4m, or w4m, or mm4ts, mw4mw, w4mm, t4mw or maybe mw4t.
What you might have told yourself at the start was just idle curiosity can easily morph into enthusiastic participation as the site's clean, simple interface leads you into the dirty, complicated belief that yours is a world awash in limitless sexual possibilities. On Craigslist, you're surrounded not only by skeevy creeps and blurry penis photos but by oats-sowing bi-curious college girls; self-described "nice guys" with jobs and proper grammar and everything; lonely, MILFy housewives who need just a bit more attention and cunnilingus than they're currently getting.
Amid the comical weirdos are people who say terribly normal-sounding things, like, "I am a year-old woman, just looking for a nice stud that isn't into the drama and bullshit. Please be able to carry on a conversation and have a sense of humor if you reply to this. Craigslist, with its insistently plain-wrap appearance, is the lowest-commitment option in an already low-commitment endeavor, so Casual Encounters' setup achieves a sort of harmonious equilibrium with the mindset of its users.
There's no registration, no fees, no pop-ups, no banners. Just lines and lines of ads, listing the multitudes of people willing to fuck you. Weekly followed four people, one from each of the four major categories — w4m, m4w, w4w, m4m — in their search for that elusive, NSA encounter. And, yes, I will spank you. I don't have whips or a dungeon. Just my open hand. And a pair of handcuffs. I'm a handsome guy, 40, 5 feet 11 inches, nice eyes, beard, a little burly, work out times per week, and I clean up real nice, as they say.
Send a photo, I'll send you mine. Terence's spanking offer might have narrowed the field, but then again, the field is always narrow for men who are seeking women, and even ads that aren't seeking anything exotic tend not to get a lot of replies.
In the personals, it's women who run the show. Terence received a whopping total of nine responses. Of those, eight were spam. These were identifiable by their extremely generic nature, typically something like, "Hey I liked your ad.
I'm on Yahoo Messenger right now! Send me a message at HotGirl! But one smelled like it might be human: Cautiously optimistic, Terence sent a response, including a picture.
The blonde replied, "Thanks for the pic Already realizing odds were against him, Terence threw in the towel, retorting, "Sorry, honey, that's as young as I get. When asked why he didn't work particularly hard to continue the established contact, by, say, inviting the blonde out for coffee, Terence gripes, "I'm fucking sick of 'coffee. The only thing I'd meet up for is if she wants to take her clothes off today. The hard lesson most men learn on Craigslist: Because they outnumber women by about 20 to 1 on Casual Encounters, men aren't something to be desired.
Very youthful, very curvy year-old in Santa Monica seeks very youthful, preferably young, attractive baby-faced man for casual encounters hopefully plural! By the way, replies without pics will not be considered. On Craigslist, women can be this flat-out demanding and not be dismissed as bitches but get plenty of play. Clarissa's ad, for example, got more than responses. The sexually adventurous, curly-haired brunette isn't averse to casual hookups.
The responses started coming in immediately. Then I got more and more replies, and had fun responding, and considered meeting someone. But then I got bored, and the only one that was really interesting has been reticent.
Her initial ardor cooled, and in the end, Clarissa didn't meet up with even one of her potential sack mates. The rising fears that dampened her heat ran the gamut: Jeopardizing my health and my business. Getting emotionally hurt by some thoughtless, shallow swinger with herpes who makes some 'they're not exactly perky' comment about my breasts while expecting me to agree and fuck him anyway.
This is the bell curve many Casual Encounters advertisers travel: If you're wondering why that sexy chick suddenly quit answering your e-mails, this sort of rational thought process is probably the reason.
Gay men are always on the vanguard of any of society's sexual shifts, for good or ill, from HIV to Grindr, and Josh sees Craigslist as antiquated. He hooked up online as recently as last week, but not via Craigslist. He checks the site from time to time, but, "In reality, I haven't had sex through Craigslist for years and years and years. With his swimmer's body, unblemished, caramel-colored skin and engaging, lighthearted, party-party personality, this resident of an Elle Decor —worthy West Hollywood apartment is clearly a desirable specimen.
Josh is in a committed relationship, but his partner has a job that forces him to travel out of town frequently; even when his boyfriend is home, his sex drive simply doesn't match Josh's. So Josh looks online for casual hookups often, and has no trouble finding them.
However, he's largely left Craigslist behind. Josh prefers a number of other sites to the creaky Craigslist, such as Adam4Adam, BarebackRT with its high proportion of users who, like himself, are HIV-positive or his favorite, Manhunt. Manhunt works because its interface has something that Craigslist has stubbornly refused to add: Twenty pictures, 20 guys.
You decide on two to three options per page, and you click.