Attention to causal sexual encounters among men who have sex with men also emerged as an area of study during the AIDS epidemic in the s until today.
These complementary literatures and approaches should be integrated into the future study of hookup behavior, because the study of human sexuality must consider the vast range of variation and potential in human sexual behaviors. A case in point, findings from the National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior identified a much higher rate of American men and women who had ever engaged in same-sex sexual behavior compared to those who identify with a homosexual orientation see Herbenick et al.
This raises an important, but as of yet unanswered, question: If a proportion of heterosexual Americans have at some point engaged in at least one same-sex sexual encounter, is the context of such a scenario a hookup? Although speculative, it seems most probable that many such encounters are sexual experiments and uncommitted, but investigations of how this relates to the larger hookup culture are sorely lacking.
This is consistent with the view of emerging adulthood typical college age as a period of developmental transition Arnett, , exploring and internalizing sexuality and romantic intimacy, now including hookups Stinson, Among college students, hookups have been reported in a variety of college settings. Such settings may help facilitate a preexisting desire for hookups i. More generally, in a sample of sexually experienced men and women, participants indicated a variety of settings where they met someone with whom they had casual sex: In addition to sharing common social venues with heterosexuals, gay men and other men who have sex with men have an expanded array of venues in which hookups may occur.
Although uncommitted sex among gay men occurs in a variety of locations, antigay prejudice and structural heterosexism can limit the availability of supportive and safe options for connecting with other men Harper, Consequently, more anonymous, sometimes public, spaces have been an alternative for some gay men.
In a sample of gay and bisexual men in college all under the age of 30 , nearly one third admitted to meeting partners in anonymous places i. Public cruising areas, Internet cruising networks, and bathhouses are somewhat popular venues although by no means archetypal for explicitly initiating uncommitted sex among men who have sex with men Binson et al.
These are not findings that seem to be prevalent among lesbians and women who have sex with women or among heterosexual hookups. An interdisciplinary biopsychosocial model can synthesize traditionally disconnected theoretical perspectives and provide a more holistic understanding of hookup culture.
Which of these factors prove to be most important depends on culture, personality, gender, and social context. Using two midlevel theories, Fisher et al. They argued that evolution may be most helpful in exploring the reproductive motive, and sexual scripts may be useful in exploring the cultural discourse agenda. That is, evolutionary biology influences why emerging adults engage in uncommitted sex and the way young men and women react to these encounters ultimate level explanations.
At the same time, social roles and sexual scripts influence how emerging adults navigate their desires in a particular socio-cultural context proximate level explanations. It is important to point out that many sociocultural theorists disagree with the idea that culture offers only a proximate level explanation for human sexual behavior.
However, it is not the goal of this review to resolve this debate. Instead, we attempt to articulate better the multitude of factors that shape the rich variety of human sexuality to enhance understanding of uncommitted sex among emerging adults.
In the next two sections, we will introduce both evolutionary and social script views of uncommitted sex, to simultaneously consider the influence of each on hookup culture. Human evolutionary behavioral studies attempts to explain sexual behavior by understanding our evolutionary history and how this may influence behavioral patterns in a given environment.
There are several different midlevel evolutionary or biological theories about the nature of human sexual behavior. These theories seek to understand the way evolutionary pressures influence human sexual propensities, variation, and, in some cases, sex differences. This logic is based on the premise that, compared to asexual reproduction, sexual reproduction is quite costly.
Sexually reproducing organisms pay many costs, including the time, energy, and resources spent in finding and attracting mates—tasks that are unnecessary for asexual reproducers Daly, Offsetting the costs of sexual reproduction in large-bodied organisms is the benefit sexual reproduction provides against easy colonization by parasites and pathogens Van Valen, Sexual reproduction scrambles up genes, creating genotypes that are novel environments and forcing the parasites and pathogens to begin anew in their quest to exploit the host.
Thus, large-bodied organisms with long lifespans generally benefit evolutionarily from sexual reproduction despite its substantial costs. In humans, producing a viable offspring, from gestation through lactation, takes females longer than it takes males. The sex with the faster potential reproductive rate— generally males— can benefit by attempting to co-opt the reproductive effort of multiple members of the opposite sex.
However, the sex with the slower potential reproductive rate— generally females—will be operationally in short supply relative to the sex with the faster potential reproductive rate, simply because it takes them longer to complete a reproductive venture.
Males are predicted to compete for access to the reproductive potential of the slower sex; this generates expectations of psychological and physical adaptations in males that enhance their chances of success, including aggression and an array of physical features e.
Females are predicted to be choosy concerning their mates because they invest more in each offspring, and they stand to lose more if they make a poor reproductive choice. Relative parental investment costs are thought to be the arbiters of mating behaviors Trivers, Thus in sex role reversed species where males provide a majority of parental support, it is females that are then expected to compete more for mates and be more indiscriminate in their mating Alcock, Because females choose males on the basis of critical features and resources, males are expected to compete with other males to acquire and display these features and resources.
This provides a basic framework with which to begin, and in humans we expect complex cognitive processes to be overlaid on it. In this view—sexual strategies theory—men prefer as many mates as possible, including short-term sexual encounters that can potentially maximize reproductive output. Men will attempt to mate with a maximum number of partners sexual variety , consent to sex more quickly than women, and provide minimal resources to any but long-term partners, only conceding to a long-term relationship for the purposes of enhancing offspring vitality Symons, ; Buss, Also in this view, women are expected to prefer long-term relationships to extract a maximum amount of resources from mates.
In measuring propensities for nonrelational sex, a variety of studies conducted within North America have demonstrated that men consistently have higher sociosexuality scores than women Schmitt, Several scholars have argued that the degree to which evolution shapes mating behaviors, including sociosexuality, will be contingent on particular environmental conditions Frayser, ; Low, ; Schmitt, To support the idea that sociosexuality is likely a combination of evolved sex-specific mating strategies and social structural factors, in a study of over , participants from 53 nations, Lippa demonstrated that although consistent sex differences emerged, gender equality and economic development tended to predict the magnitude of sex differences in sociosexuality more permissive.
Similarly, Wood and Eagly have endorsed a biosocial model for understanding sex differences cross-culturally that takes into account multiple levels of analyses, including biological constraints alongside social and economic constraints. In support of evolved sexual strategies, in a cross-cultural study of 16, individuals across 52 nations, Schmitt et al.
Using the short-term seeking measure asking participants on a 7-point scale whether they are actively seeking a short-term mate , they reported that, in North America, relatively more men Of note, using the cross-cultural responses of those who are single excluding those currently involved in a relationship , Evolutionary-inclined researchers have often used these findings to point to the adaptive nature of sex-specific mating strategies see Schmitt, These data demonstrate fairly modest relative sex differences in propensities toward sex beyond a committed relationship—which are indeed important to document.
Yet, a cross-cultural sex difference of This is especially true considering that, compared to males, the relative risks of sexual behavior are higher for females: Although there is a reasonable proportional difference between sexes, there are still nearly two thirds of unpartnered women interested in uncommitted sex and over one fifth of unpartnered men who are not interested in this activity.
In short, there is significant overlap between the sexes and significant variation within the sexes. All things considered, the simplest expectation is that evolutionary processes will result in both men and women desiring both sex and pair-bonding. Extrarelational sex is part of the human mating repertoire, as is pair-bonding. The popularity of hooking up among both men and women presents a problem for approaching human sexuality purely from the perspective of sexual strategies theory.
That both men and women are engaging in this behavior at such high rates is not consistent with the model. Homosexual relationships also presents a quandary for sexual strategies theory. Although the proportion of gay men in open relationships seems to support the theory i. For instance, Li and Kenrick have pointed to the benefits of using an evolutionary economic model of tradeoffs to understand sex differences in willingness to engage in short-term sex, and sex similarities in prioritization of short-term partners.
Using biological and cross-cultural evidence, Fisher , has argued human possess a dual reproductive strategy of social monogamy serial or long-term and clandestine adultery. In their comparison of theoretical models, they found that attachment fertility theory. If humans possess a fairly flexible sexual repertoire, yet pair-bonding is essential, this sets the stage for a conflict between competing motivational drives that are fine tuned to particular environments.
In accordance with an evolutionary model, the simplest, most general prediction is that men will be relatively more competitive and sexually eager, and that women will be relatively choosier.
Further, in accordance with an evolutionary model emphasizing pair-bonding, both men and women will have competing motivational drives for sexual engagement and pair-bond formation.
This might assume that penetrative sexual intercourse between fertile men and women entails a sizable risk of reproduction for females—an assumption that simply no longer applies to humans in the 21st century. In contemporary industrialized cultures, pleasurable sexual behaviors can be divorced from reproduction and used for other purposes, including social standing and simple enjoyment, among others.
Contraception and reproductive technologies allow women greater control over reproduction, but this should not be enough to completely overwrite millions of years of evolutionary pressure to shape certain aspects of mating psychology.
Rather, in these contemporary conditions, those who use contraception to optimize their reproductive output may well be evolutionarily favored.
Women could, for example, use contraception to control the timing of pregnancies in ways that maximize the chance of success, or ensure parentage by favored males over lesser-quality mates. Thus, contraception is simply an additional feature of the environment of reproduction, and males and females are expected to attempt to manipulate it in their own favor. However, the ability to divorce sex from reproduction should allow for less discrepancy between males and females in willingness to engage in uncommitted sex and negotiations of both sexual and romantic desires.
Clearly, the evolved reproductive motive involves both sexes desiring sex and desiring pair-bonds, but having different ways of obtaining each and different prioritizations for each. Scripts, particularly gender-normative ones, dictate behaviors, such as who does what and when in context e.
The most widely produced and promoted cultural sexual scripts are heterosexual in nature and include those focused on male roles Kim et al. For men, sex is portrayed as central to male identity, men prefer nonrelational sex, and men are active sexual agents. Women are portrayed as sexual objects, sexually passive compared to men, and women act as sexual gatekeepers. Sexual script theory is generally vague when it comes to origins, focusing more on descriptions of scripts.
Wiederman , Phillips , and Jhally have argued that scripts are not only sexualized but also gendered, with underlying sexual messages being noticeably different for men and women. Many researchers Jhally, ; Kim et al.
But this does little to explain why the media industry produces these scripts in the first place. It is not by accident that consumer behavior can be well-explained by those products most salient to human survival and reproduction, and why messages of love and sex are among the most producible Saad, But, on their own, both the evolutionary perspective and the social scripts perspective have thus far been inadequate in fully unpacking the origin of sexual messages, their propagation, and their social retention.
Without identifying a primary, hierarchal, origin, it is likely that media is reflecting actual behavioral change in a circular way—media is a reflection of our evolutionary penchants, further exaggerated and supported by the presumption that it is popular.
Images of a polymorphous sexuality that decenters the reproductive motive and focuses instead on sexual pleasure are consistently appearing in popular media. It seems plausible that sexual scripts in popular entertainment media are exaggerated examples of behaviors that are taken to an extreme for the purposes of media sensationalism and activation of core guttural interests. Conflicting gendered scripts may contribute to mixed perceptions and expectations of hookups.
The first sexual experiences described by the 30 participants were almost all quite negative and, in some cases, horrific.
Many women find the discrepant messages difficult to navigate: Messages often portray the sexually assertive woman as a woman who has extreme difficulty in being genuine and having a meaningful romantic relationship. Psychoanalytic analysis views this conflict as the Madonna—whore dichotomy, where women face challenges in being viewed as both a sexually expressive being and a maternal committed being, and at the same time their romantic or sexual partners face challenges with categorizing women as one or the other Welldon, Presumably, these same conflicting discourse messages can make it difficult for individuals to psychologically navigate hookups, including sexual decision-making.
There seems to be inconsistency in the scripts pertaining to the casualness and emotional investment in causal sexual encounters. An example of this disconnect is presented by Backstrom, Armstrong, and Puentes , whose study examined the responses of 43 college women who described their difficulties in their negotiations of cunnilingus, such as desiring it in a hookup or not desiring it in a relationship. Yet, in interviews, participants also expressed distinct discomfort with these extrarelational scripts.
Men voiced alternative definitions that highlighted emotional connection and the potential for committed romantic relationships. While contrary to no-strings attached hookup discourse, these alternative romance and commitment-oriented scripts are not surprising. Similar discourse messages are present in other aspects of popular media.
It is curious that, although purporting to regale the audience with nonrelational sex, the previously mentioned films Friends with Benefits and No Strings Attached also highlight this; in the end, couples in both movies actually end up in seemingly monogamous romantic relationships.
Although the evolutionary reproductive motives produce contradictory motivations, for both short-term sex and long-term commitment, some media scripts apparently do the same. Despite the high prevalence of uncommitted sexual behavior, emerging adults often have competing nonsexual interests. Although there is a proportional sex difference, note that a substantial majority of both sexes would prefer a romantic relationship, despite their particular developmental stage of emerging adulthood.
The gender differences observed are modest, and point to the convergence of gender roles in hookup culture; even though there are some gender differences, it should not be ignored that the curves overlap significantly. Just as the discourse of hooking up is often in conflict with itself, individuals often self-identify a variety of motivations for hooking up. That a substantial portion of individuals reported emotional and romantic motivations appears to be in apparent conflict with the sexual strategies framework discussed earlier, which predicts significant sex differences.
Indeed, some hookups turn into romantic relationships. Paik a found that individuals in relationships that start as hookups or FWBs report lower average relationship satisfaction. However, this varied as a function of whether the participants initially wanted a relationship. If individuals were open to a serious committed relationship initially, relationship satisfaction was just as high as those who did not engage in initially uncommitted sexual activity prior to starting a relationship Paik, a.
The entanglement of more intimate and emotional aspects with sex is something the romantic comedy movies mentioned earlier highlight. Again in seeming contrast to the sex-specific mating strategies, contemporary hookup behavior involves a high degree of female sexual assertiveness for sexual desire and pleasure.
Contrary to some media messages, individuals do not appear to be engaging in truly no-strings attached sex. Competing interests at multiple levels result in young adults having to negotiate multiple desires, and multiple social pressures. Again, the most fruitful explanation is that both men and women have competing sexual and romantic interests, with tremendous individual differences in such desires.
As such, the simultaneous motivations for sex and romance may appear different. The origins of these pro-sex scripts have been theorized to be due to a subculture focused on male sexuality Mealey, Because same-sex relationships are naturally removed from the reproductive motive, it may be possible that part of the larger hookup culture is borrowed from sexual subcultures involving greater emphasis on the positive erotic.
Most students reported not considering or realizing their own health risks during hookups, particularly those that occurred within their own community such as with someone else on their own college campus. Compounding disease risks, individuals involved in hookups are more likely to have concurrent sexual partners Paik, b.
In a sample of 1, college students, among the students who had engaged in oral sex, anal sex, or vaginal intercourse in their most recent hookup, only Although, in Paul et al. Health-based hookup research like this may lead to programs for correcting misperceptions of sexual risk and sexual norms to ultimately restore individual locus of control over sexual behavior, reproductive rights, and healthy personal decision-making.
In addition to sexual risk-taking, in terms of low condom use, another issue of concern involving hookups is the high comorbidity with substance use.
Alcohol use has also been associated with type of hookup: In one study of men and women who had engaged in an uncommitted sexual encounter that included vaginal, anal, or oral sex, participants reported their intoxication levels: Alcohol may also serve as an excuse, purposely consumed as a strategy to protect the self from having to justify hookup behavior later Paul, This paints a picture very different from popular representations of alcohol and substance use in hookups, which are often handled with a detached air of humor.
A Journal Chronicle Books, is playfully described by the publisher: Although alcohol and drugs are likely a strong factor, it is still largely unclear what role individual differences play in shaping decisions to engage in hookups. Other factors may include media consumption, personality, and biological predispositions. Garcia, MacKillop, et al.
This suggests that biological factors that contribute to motivating the different contexts of sexual behavior for both men and women may be fairly sexually monomorphic Garcia, Reiber, et al. This may, in some cases, point to fairly stable individual differences. The discrepancy between behaviors and desires, particularly with respect to social—sexual relationships, has dramatic implications for physical and mental health.
Despite widespread allure, uncommitted sexual behavior has been shown to elicit a pluralistic ignorance response promoting individuals to engage in behaviors regardless of privately feeling uncomfortable with doing so Lambert et al. Misperception of sexual norms is one potential driver for people to behave in ways they do not personally endorse. In a replication and extension of Lambert et al. Hookup scenarios may include feelings of pressure and performance anxiety.
In Paul et al. Note that this study asked participants about typical hookups, and although this was informative for general patterns, it does not capture specific factors influencing specific individual scenarios. However, this same study found that feelings differed during compared to after hookups: An individual history of hookup behavior has been associated with a variety of mental health factors.
In a recent study of young adults followed across a university semester, those participants with more depressive symptoms and greater feelings of loneliness who engaged in penetrative sex hookups subsequently reported a reduction in both depressive symptoms and feelings of loneliness Owen et al. At the same time, those participants who reported less depressive symptoms and fewer feelings of loneliness who engaged in penetrative sex hookups subsequently reported an increase in both depressive symptoms and feelings of loneliness Owen et al.
In another study, among sexually experienced individuals, those who had the most regret after uncommitted sex also had more symptoms of depression than those who had no regret Welsh et al. In the first study to investigate the issue of self-esteem and hookups, both men and women who had ever engaged in an uncommitted sexual encounter had lower overall self-esteem scores compared to those without uncommitted sexual experiences Paul et al. The potential causal direction of the relationship between self-esteem and uncommitted sex is yet unclear Paul et al.
Hookups can result in guilt and negative feelings. The percentage of women expressing guilt was more than twice that of men. This is consistent with a classic study by Clark and Hatfield , which demonstrated that men are much more likely than women to accept casual sex offers from attractive confederates.
Conley replicated and extended this finding, demonstrating that, under certain conditions of perceived comfort, the gender differences in acceptance of casual sex is diminished. Possibly contributing to findings on gender differences in thoughts of worry, in a sample of undergraduate students, more women than men leaned toward a relationship outcome following a hookup.
It is possible that regret and negative consequences result from individuals attempting to negotiate multiple desires. It is likely that a substantial portion of emerging adults today are compelled to publicly engage in hookups while desiring both immediate sexual gratification and more stable romantic attachments.
Not all hookup encounters are necessarily wanted or consensual. In a sample of college students, participants noted that a majority of their unwanted sex occurred in the context of hookups: Even more worrisome, a proportion of hookups also involve nonconsensual sex. In a study by Lewis et al. Unwanted and nonconsensual sexual encounters are more likely occurring alongside alcohol and substance use.
A number of studies have included measures of regret with respect to hookups, and these studies have documented the negative feelings men and women may feel after hookups. In a large web-based study of 1, undergraduate students, participants reported a variety of consequences: A vast majority of both sexes indicated having ever experienced regret. There were few sex differences in reasons for regret, and better quality sex reduced the degree of regret reported Fisher et al.
It appears the method of asking participants whether and when they had experienced regret i. On average, both men and women appear to have higher positive affect than negative affect following a hookup. Those with positive attitudes toward hookups and approval of sexual activity show the greatest positive affect Lewis et al.
However, there are also negative consequences experienced by both sexes. Two types of sexual encounters were particularly predictive of sexual regret: Among a sample of 1, individuals who had experienced a previous one-night stand, Campbell showed that most men and women have combinations of both positive and negative affective reactions following this event.
There are substantial individual differences in reactions to hookups not accounted for by gender alone. The gap between men and women is notable, and demonstrates an average sex difference in affective reactions. Yet, this finding also conflicts with a strict sexual strategies model because more than half of women were glad they engaged in a hookup and they were not in the context of commandeering extrapartner genes for offspring.
With respect to scripts, although presumably being sexually agentic e. Although the direction of the sex differences is in agreement with the evolutionary model, that nearly a quarter of women report primarily positive reactions is inconsistent with a truly sex-specific short-term mating psychology and with discourse messages of uncommitted sex being simply pleasurable. Also inconsistent with both of these theoretical models is that a quarter of men experience negative reactions.
Taken alone, neither a biological nor social model is sufficient to explain these individual differences. Some research has considered the interactions of sex and individual differences in predicting hookup behavior. In this regard, there are sex differences in cognitive processes, but one cannot necessarily presume that the sexes vary fundamentally in their behavioral potentials; rather, they vary in their decision-making, consistent with other evolutionary models.
It is still unclear the degree to which hookups may result in positive reactions, and whether young men and young women are sexually satisfied in these encounters.
Fine has argued that sex negativity is even more pronounced for women and the possibility of desire seems to be missing from the sexual education of young women.
Armstrong, England, and Fogarty addressed sexual satisfaction in a large study of online survey responses from 12, undergraduates from 17 different colleges. In this study, men reported receiving oral sex both in hookups and in relationships much more than women.
In both contexts, men also reached orgasm more often than women. A challenge to the contemporary sexual double standard would mean defending the position that young women and men are equally entitled to sexual activity, sexual pleasure, and sexual respect in hookups as well as relationships. To achieve this, the attitudes and practices of both men and women need to be confronted. Men should be challenged to treat even first hookup partners as generously as the women they hook up with treat them.
Taken together, this points to a need for further and more diverse attention to the impact of hookups on the physical and mental health of individuals, as recommended by Heldman and Wade Further, more attention is needed on potential positive aspects of hooking up, such as promoting sexual satisfaction and mutual comfort and enjoyment see Armstrong et al. Hookups are part of a popular cultural shift that has infiltrated the lives of emerging adults throughout the Westernized world.
The past decade has witnessed an explosion in interest in the topic of hookups, both scientifically and in the popular media. Research on hookups is not seated within a singular disciplinary sphere; it sits at the crossroads of theoretical and empirical ideas drawn from a diverse range of fields, including psychology, anthropology, sociology, biology, medicine, and public health.
The growth of our understanding of the hookup phenomenon is likely predicated on our ability to integrate these theoretical and empirical ideas into a unified whole that is capable of explaining the tremendous variety in human sexual expression. Both evolutionary and social forces are likely facilitating hookup behavior, and together may help explain the rates of hookups, motivations for hooking up, perceptions of hookup culture, and the conflicting presence and lack of sex differences observed in various studies.
Several scholars have suggested that shifting life-history patterns may be influential in shaping hookup patterns. Together, the research reviewed here can help us better understand the nature of uncommitted sex today.
It is worth noting, however, that several shortcomings in our knowledge continue to impede the understanding of hookup behavior. Much of the research asking participants about previous hookup relationships may therefore be biased due to recall. The literature reviewed here primarily focuses on heterosexual hookups among emerging adults, with some researchers not controlling for sexual orientation some purposefully and others restricting to exclusively heterosexual samples.
Future hookup research should venture into the MSM literature to explore patterns of casual sex among these populations to understand other sexual subcultures where uncommitted sexual behavior is prevalent.
Moreover, there exists little published literature on the hookup patterns among lesbians and women who have sex with women. Understanding hookups during the critical stage of late adolescent development and young adulthood is paramount for protecting and promoting healthy sexuality and healthy decision-making among emerging adults. Of the varied experiences and health risks young men and young women will experience, perhaps none are as pervasive and widely experienced as engagement in and desire for romantic attachments and experiences with sexual activity.
This review suggests that uncommitted sex, now being explored from a variety of disciplinary and theoretical perspectives, is best understood from a biopsychosocial perspective that incorporates recent research trends in human biology, reproductive and mental health, and sexuality studies. Both popular scripts and predictions from evolutionary theory suggest that a reproductive motive may influence some sexual patterns, such as motivation and regret following uncommitted sex.
However, patterns of casual sex among gay men highlight inadequacies of the reproductive motive and suggest that further theorizing is necessary before a satisfactory evolutionarily informed theory can be established. We thank Melanie Hill for valuable discussion and feedback on an earlier draft of this review. We also thank Maryanne Fisher and Catherine Salmon for helpful editorial feedback.
National Center for Biotechnology Information , U. Author manuscript; available in PMC Jun 1. Garcia , Chris Reiber , Sean G.
Massey , and Ann M. Correspondence concerning this article should be addressed to Justin R. See other articles in PMC that cite the published article. Cultural Shifts in Dating Hookup culture has emerged from more general social shifts taking place during the last century.
Representation of Hookups in Popular Culture Contemporary popular culture is now ripe with examples that depict and often encourage sexual behavior, including premarital and uncommitted sex. Hookup Venues Among college students, hookups have been reported in a variety of college settings.
Theoretical Frameworks for Hookup Research An interdisciplinary biopsychosocial model can synthesize traditionally disconnected theoretical perspectives and provide a more holistic understanding of hookup culture. In their comparison of theoretical models, they found that attachment fertility theory posits that short-term mating and other forms of mating outside of pair-bonds are natural byproducts of a suite of attachment and care-giving mechanisms… selected for in human evolutionary history to ultimately enable men and women to seek, select, create, and maintain a pair-bond… pointing to an increasingly coherent picture of the underlying biological and chemical systems involved… that generally operate similarly for men and women.
Prevalence of Alcohol and Drugs In addition to sexual risk-taking, in terms of low condom use, another issue of concern involving hookups is the high comorbidity with substance use. Hookup Culture and Psychological Well-Being The discrepancy between behaviors and desires, particularly with respect to social—sexual relationships, has dramatic implications for physical and mental health.
Hookup Regret A number of studies have included measures of regret with respect to hookups, and these studies have documented the negative feelings men and women may feel after hookups. Conclusion Hookups are part of a popular cultural shift that has infiltrated the lives of emerging adults throughout the Westernized world. Contributor Information Justin R. Alcohol and dating risk factors for sexual assault among college women.
Psychology of Women Quarterly. The homosexualization of America: The Americanization of the homosexual. Orgasm in college hookups and relationships. Families as they really are. A theory of development from the late teens through the twenties.
Journal of Sex Research. From front porch to back seat: Courtship in twentieth century America. Johns Hopkins University Press; Differential HIV risk in bathhouses and public cruising areas. American Journal of Public Health. Negotiating a friends with benefits relationship. Archives of Sexual Behavior.
Cambridge University Press; Sex differences and similarities in initiation, selection, and dissolution. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin. The shift from dating to hooking up in college: What scholars have missed. That's because almost all women have control over the number of sex partners and only a few men do.
Right off there can't be a double standard when considering that the vast majority of men are lucky to get an occasional hookup. Male orgasm isn't associated with oxytocin release?! This has been established for years. It's shameful that the author couldn't even google it.
Oxytocin plays a couple of different essential roles in the process for men, so thanks for the link. Ruth was just trying to make a female-biology-as-male-destiny type of argument. Happens all the time. Feminacentrism is another manifestation of Womenfirsters' power to define the agenda. It requires looking at all problems exclusively from women's perspective, or for the purpose of seeing how women are affected. It is based on the idea that women are more virtuous, more important than men.
Feminacentrism is blind to the problems men face. Never generalize from your own experience to the experience of most "women. That generalizing is neither good psychology nor good sociology. All it is, is good presumption. When the author says "most And her statements about the sex differences are not derived from personal experience I suppose because they have been confirmed by countless surveys, studies and experiments.
Sounds like Pollyanna wrote this paper, in the 's. Should have been broken down by age. If you want babies, pick up a guy in a drunken state hoping for marriage and you are say, 28, yes-perhaps a hook-up could be depressing. If you are 45, divorced, into your career, already been there-done that with children and your hook-up agrees with your premise-we are talking an entirely different theme.
No alcohol need be involved, just two grown ups having a casual, safe and temporary friendship. Thank you for this comment! I am right in that same situation and finding anything useful about sex at post divorce not by choice is far and apart. I have 4 kids a full time job and no urge to deal with "relationship" stuff.
Still I have physical needs, used to have daily sex with my husband for 22 years. I can relieve myself by masturbating, but in the long it is not very satisfying. There is a definite difference in having a partner to share it with lol It felt strange at first, but if you have dealt with your loss and defined your needs, I say: I figure that conducting research with American college students as subjects might be easy, but I doubt that insights could be extended to the rest of the female population in the world.
I am perfectly alright with the idea of casual sex that is planned, and where parties are considerate to each other. Consent is established well before the first drink, so alcohol shouldn't be a consideration. It seems to me that research is biased in considering that marriage should be the purpose of sex; and that sex alone is never emotionally satisfying for a woman.
By studying young populations, studies keep the premises 'immature', and keep perpetuating myths about what men and women want. Yes, women of ALL ages are quite capable of having NSA sex without regrets, and I'd argue that a lot more would do it in the absence of ominous social judgements.
Even those enlightened women failed eventually in there promiscuous practices. And as for the comments calling out social judgments, society also judges the obese. Is obesity a healthy practice to should sensationalized by an "enlightened" culture. Did you seriously just cite Sex and the City as if it were a documentary of some kind on female sexuality?
I hate even having to type the words, but: You do realize those women are characters, right? Their failures were contrived by a group of writers who probably harbor the same little grain of regressive conservative thinking that most people in this country do when it comes to the idea of women having sex. Who knows if it's improbable? Cross cultural studies would be useful to take a look at different forms of casual sex in places less puritanical than the U. The "sexual revolution" wasn't so long ago, and women are still shamed and derided from all angles of society for wanting sex, for how they want sex, for how often or how little they want sex, and on and on and on.
There are many more social reasons than biological ones for why women experience casual sex less I foresee that gap fading eventually, but not any faster for all the articles pulled out of thin air to make it a contentious issue whether women even like this or that kind of sex.
Paternalism at its finest to take a behavior many women partake in and then ask if they, despite doing it en masse, are even biologically capable of enjoying it. S never knew that. I have been following the debate of casual sex and women and searched for some genuine and useful advise and feedback. What I run into is mostly American websites and the research that has been conducted is primarily on college aged young adults and the "hook up" culture.
Women have been having casual sex in all times, but it has been condemned by society and therefore kept under the "blankets".
I am a mature woman of 45y, with 4 kids. I have been single for 1. I only had had 1 boyfriend before marrying. I have done my mourning, signed the divorce agreement, worked on my self spiritually in prayer, meditation and with my minister.
Emotionally I am stable and fulfilled, I have supportive friends, family and my children. Physically I am in great shape, healthy and fit. I work full time and my economy is in order. I am missing sex! Of course I can masturbate to relief my sexual needs and I do release tension by my "own hand".
It is a poor substitute though to real sexual interaction with another human being. Kissing, caressing and making out, feeling another body next to yours and having the oxytocin release: Modern research reveals that it happens to men too, not only women!
I just put that oxytocin into good use cuddling my children, since mommy is on cloud nine after a night with some great "no strings attached" sex. I have no time or space in my life at this point to commit to a relationship. I am discreet, I am safe. Condom is a must. I do not leave my home number or address. I am ready to take the risk of a brief emotional attachment, actually that is one of my requirements.
If there is no feeling of "connection" emotionally, physically, spiritually I do not "hook up" with the guy. The great thing is that men are also looking for that connection! The guys I have met are not looking for brainless banging. They want to discuss life, relationships, religion, spirituality, dreams, passions Both know it is a none commitment thing, we meet and we part.
Hopefully both parties have had an expanding experience. I feel blessed to have shared that moment with them and my life is richer and my pussy is tender from hours of great sex and multiple orgasms!!!! So girl, please do take responsibility to cater for your own needs. If you are honest with yourself and your partner and not trying to cover up alternative motives, go for it.
There are men that are looking for a great experience with a mature, assertive sexy lady that they can connect with and share a night or two of pleasure, no strings attached This article repeats the same bullshit assumptions I keep seeing about women and casual sex. I am 37 and single. I have mostly been single for my whole life, although I ended a 5-year relationship almost a year ago.
I never have had a problem with it. It is a godsend! I have physical needs just like any man, and like filling them with a little variety, thank you very much. The issue is with expectations: If you both just want to have a little fun, what's the harm in that? As long as both people realize what the deal is, it's great.
I agree that many women can do it. And it is also possible that there are generational differences. I have several female friends Europe, different countries, around yrs who went through an NSA sex phase for different reasons. Some were after long, abusive or unhappy relationships, some were left by their partner. From my part, I only went into a relationship with the knowledge that the guy is not for me and that this will end rather sooner than later.
I felt strongly attracted, and the guy did not lie at any stage, no false hopes for future together etc. Nevertheless, even when I entered, I knew it will be painful when it ends.
And it was 3 months later. I am a bonding type of person, want to know my partner intimately and share my life with him, so no way will I do NSA sex. For some, just the fact, that the guy was clearly not interested in them as a person, but more like a sex object, caused them to feel used regardless of their consent even if sex was physically satisfying for them.
I haven't read the above article regarding male oxytocin release during sex, but in another one earlier I did read that the testosterone if released in large amount will counteract the released oxytocin - and hence certain males will not bond via sex whereas women do not have this "defense". Stereotypes are not the full picture, I agree. And for the same reason I also do not like some men writing about their need for casual sex as a generalised, all men's dream of thing.
Non-functioning, boring, sexless, etc. PUA community using tools of a sociopathic narcissist's mindset to basically rape women some using covert hypnosis, young, gullible, undereducated, psychologically troubled etc.
The difference I see between this and roofying someone, that with the drug it is more provable that abuse happened. One of the terms in PUA lingo clearly describes this: Some PUA gurus after a while get more chilled and end up in monogamous relationships but by then they contributed to tremendous abuse directly and indirectly for female victims as well as their customers.
Looking at Maslow's hierarchy, sex is a fundamental. Looking at health-focused research, sex is healthy and necessary. What do you do if you are alone? After one year with no one-on-one sex, I decided to try a casual arrangement. From the first, it was wonderful.
There are no undercurrents, and each of us can get out at any time, no questions asked. I am very happy. I am 54 and he is If women can be choosy about the height, physical appearance, and wealth of their casual sex partners, why shouldn't men be choosy about the past sexual conduct or "morals" of their potential long-term relationship partners?
The so-called "double standard" works both ways. The simple fact is, women these days have more options and more choices than men. That's why heterosexual bars and clubs have "ladies night" instead of "men's night". The women, not the men, get to do the choosing. At closing time on ladies night, a group of average, slightly shy, somewhat short men are sitting alone at the bar while the women have left with all the big, tall, square jawed athletic looking guys with big feet- the same guys who went home with different women after the last ladies night.
That's fine- we all should have the freedom to make our own choices, but we also have to face the consequences of our actions. I would like to point out that young boys don't dream about growing up and marrying girls for who they are sexual partner number 25 any more than daddy wants his little girl to grow up to be a porn star. And no amount of hypocritical, self-righteous "feminism"- short of a totalitarian "Brave New World"- is going to change that dynamic. While I don't approve of that group's behavior, I do think that what they are doing cannot in any way be compared to "rape" as you suggested.
Lying maybe, but rape, no. What you are implying is that women are too stupid to make their own choices or to see through childish head games. As someone who believes in the mental equality even superiority of women, I find your suggestion appalling. If a woman feels "used" afterwards, perhaps that's a sign that she should be more choosy, or even delay a sexual involvement for some time until she's sure about the man's intentions.
I'ts sad that women are falling for that sort of thing, but they made a choice, so live and learn. I think a lot of frustrated guys who lack self confidence, good looks, or stature are likely to try the "PUA" methodology, because they've felt rejected or hurt by women, and also they see the blatant hypocrisy in women's sexual behavior.
By hypocrisy, I mean the way women promote the idea of a finding a loving, committed partner i. The popularity of "PUA" tricks shouldn't be any more shocking than that of "penis enlargement" gimmicks which don't work; these industries prey upon gullible men with deep seated insecurities, fears which are often amplified by women's actual behavior. The first glaringly problematic comment the author made, is that "in my personal experience, most women cannot have casual sex without feeling hurt if the other person doesn't call back and has no intention of doing so.
It is obvious from that sentence, that the author is butt-hurt about a guy Feeling ashamed of herself, she decided to extrapolate her experience to mean "most women must feel this way since that is how I feel. I do not understand how one author's personal butt-hurt made it into a renowned magazine about Psychology as a general guideline. I assure you, as a man, it is equally obnoxious to hook up with a girl you like and have her never show up again or call you back.
It is a silly double standard to assume that women do not do this to men as well, to assume women do not sport-fuck you for a notch on their belt, because many of them will and you will not know about it until afterwards.
I also take issue with the whole "if she has to drink to have sex, maybe she shouldn't be having sex. People drink to lower inhibitions and get laid. It just happens that way.
Sex is fun when it's thrilling and has that "is this going to happen? A drunk man's inhibitions are not lowered any less than a drunk woman's, and for this reason I say I believe hooking up even when there is some form of attachment can be quite possible and, not only that, but very fulfilling. I am a young single mother and I have found that most of my relationships since my daughter was born, have been very short lived and meaningless.
There is one person who has become both, a friend, and a lover. He happens to be my daughter's father. We spend time as a family, but want nothing to do with a serious relationship between the two of us. We are simply two people who have a child together that occasionally share in a physically gratifying arrangement. If either one of is were to want to settle, we are more than welcome to walk away, and if not, we are both perfectly fine in our situation.
We can also feel free to hook up with other people if we so choose. It takes away the awkwardness of having to share ourselves with new people if we didn't want to, plus we both know what each other likes and it is just easy and fun. The main problem with this article and many similar articles is the basic misinterpretation of oxytocin release. Yes, oxytocin is released during orgasm and is a factor for women becoming attached to men. However, that attachment is a sexual attachment NOT an emotional attachment.
Having an orgasm, will make a woman want to have sex with that man again but it won't cause her to suddenly fall in love with him, want a committed relationship with him if she wasn't already , or become emotionally attached. The main problem is that there's still an underlying assumption that women become emotionally attached from sex.
As a result, what boys and girls are taught about sexual behavior and research on how men and women react to sex will almost always be interpreted from a biased viewpoint. An analogy would be if a crime was committed and the police automatically assumed from the start one man we'll call him Pete was the perp.
This would result in the police solely focusing on Pete, interpreting the evidence as proof of Pete's guilt ie the perp was a man I am 32 and female and have had 4 long term relationships 3 to 5 years though I really don't know why. I have zero desire to get married or have kids, never have. When I am single, which I am now, I have tons of fuck buddies and nsa sex, and they almost never have alcohol or drugs involved.
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Base it on a male prospective, I gag at the very thought even though I do not to their lifestyle since I tend to agree with the scientific theories and research on the subject. OP's first 3 questions are moot since getting a divorce.
They are more for self-esteem issues that she should not concern herself with since he was looking for a beard and nothing to do with her. Only the fourth question is germane to her situation. Her bringing it up makes it a concern since it shows she sees a real threat. She should for now keep vilgilent. There are certainly lots of bad, but there are certainly lots of bad straight ones too.
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