Naked shootout!!

October 21st, 2009 by Tambland Leave a reply »

If I haven’t got your attention yet, I’m not sure what will. But if you haven’t heard the news, or seen the story, the Tampa Bay Lightning took part in a naked shootout at practice the other day.

From what I gather, and I’m no expert, each time a player misses in the shootout, they had to remove an article of clothing. Apparently, investigators were on site within minutes of hearing that a young boy was being asked to remove his hockey equipment. Egg was later found on their faces when the alleged victim was found to be Martin St. Louis.

Nevertheless, the naked shootout is now joining the ranks of other unique practice drills to help build camaraderie amongst the ranks of a struggling team. Other unsuccessful forays have included dodgeball, and, well dodgeball.

So in honour of the naked shootout and last week’s incredibly scintillating dodgeball practice, I’m going to present a few more ideas for what teams can do to feel better about themselves.

Boston Bruins

Hit the buzzer and the Toronto Maple Leafs might give you another draft pick! Classy.

Hit the buzzer and the Toronto Maple Leafs might give you another draft pick! Classy.

A round-robin game of the board game Operation is just what this team needs right about now. No, not to help get Milan Lucic and Marc Savard off injured reserve. It is merely a team-building exercise. For each time an opponent hits the buzzer, you receive a Toronto Maple Leafs draft pick. Knowing how much they will be worth, word has it that Brian Burke has been honing up on his tweezer skills.

San Jose Sharks

Apparently, the San Jose Sharks merchandising department didn’t know what to do with all the useless Patrick Marleau Captain jerseys, so they donated them to Sharks practice to play a giant game of King of the Hill. Apparently things got a little rough when Dany Heatley refused to diminish his role, and he waved his stick violently in the air at anyone who tried to get him off. Not yet knowing that Dany Heatley can’t take a hit, the rest of the team went back to the dressing room.

Detroit Red Wings

I have it on good authority that the Detroit Red Wings have been trying utilizing a team game of Red Rover. The only problem is that some of their players have heard the KHL call them over, and they took it too literally.  I’m looking at you, Jiri Hudler.

Minnesota Wild

Word has it that GM Chuck Fletcher has been planning a massive game of Freeze Tag. You all remember; once you’re tagged you have to stay completely still until someone runs under your raised arms. The hope is that the team will start to encourage each other to skate and move around more, rather than just standing around in the neutral zone hoping for a win.

Stay classy, unique practice techniques.

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  1. Burgundy says:

    @ Tambland – Hilarious as always.

    On a completely unrelated note, I challenge any Stayclassy reader to a game of Operation. I will destroy anyone.

  2. Tambland says:

    (Ed. note)- I also considered the obvious joke in Detroit about not knowing how to say Abdelkader, hence leaving him feel left out of the team-building exercise.

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